Are you one of these or do you know one of these?

Ever meet someone who puts everyone else before themselves. I have met other people like this. They seem to have boundless energy and time to give both inside and outside the home. As a matter of fact I have one of them living in my house right now. It is my nephew Brady. He is only 12 years old. He will do anything a person asks of him. He is helpful, quiet, considerate, observant, and many other things that I find amazing. I was the same way when I was growing up. I have the desire to still live this way but not the energy or time that it takes. Are people like this built differently than others? Does the world need us, want us, use and take advantage of us? These and many more questions have occurred to me. After many years of self analyzing I know why I am like this. But how do others become this? A few weeks ago we had a pretty interesting Bible Study having to do with things like empathy, sympathy, compassion, brotherly love, kindness etc. The general consensus in the room was that it is hard to be these things. I felt alone, because my nature is the opposite to a fault it is very hard for me not to be like this. I have been like this to so many for so long that I burned myself out. However it is still my nature and even when I am tired and I know better I over extend myself to take care of others. And I know from history that many people take advantage, I still keep going. Why? I don't know, but I hope I continue to learn and am able to use these positive behaviors with wisdom.

Where's my cough drop and cough syrup?

Well we are looking at over three weeks now that I have been sick. Although I am no longer contagious, I am still coughing a lot. I was thinking of changing my blog name too. I do feel tremendously better! I pray not to have a relapse. Because I knew I needed to recover and couldn't sleep with all of the coughing I had a lot of time for retrospection. I realized this was both God and nature telling me to lighten up, back off, delegate, let it go, find peace, etc. I am a control freak and self diagnosed OCD girl. So it is really hard for me to hand over any task. Then everything turns into chaos because I try to do everything myself and fail miserably. This gives me little peace. Then I realize it, I see it happening and I just keep on the same destructive path. Why then if I know logically that praying, studying, proper exercise, food, and water will solve most of this do I keep on this path? I don't know. I do know that even if I had everything just right, life would still be tough. But I also know that if I got on the right path with Jesus and did my best to stay there that my anxiousness about all of life's stuff would be subsided. To have that peace of mind would be great. To take care of my body as commanded would be great too. So pray for me here is to the health of my mind and body.

10 Days Later and Still Sick!

Well I am sorry to report that I am still sick. It turns out that I have pneumonia. I have missed almost a week of work. My house continues on it's downward spiral and I am going nuts!! Did you know that you can buy the original version of Nyquil from the pharmacist. It turns out that although the anti-biotic is basically doing it's job. I am still sick because of all of the choking and coughing which are preventing me from sleeping. So I purchased the real stuff and instead of waking up 5 to 10 times per hour I only wake up 1 or 2 times. So hopefully this is real progress and I can go back to work tomorrow. I did learn that it's o.k. to ask for help. Also it's o.k. not to obsess over all the little details. I had fooled myself into thinking that these things really mattered. Lesson learned God. I get it. Only You are in control. So I will do my best to relinquish my obsessive behavior and let You be in charge.

A Post About Not Posting!

Hello Everyone,

Well the last couple of weeks have seemed more like a couple of months. I have two very ill Uncle's one on each side of the family. A friend and neighbor of 10.5 years passed away unexpectedly. I have the flu, yuck! Work has been busier than ever. With the flu I just keep falling behind on everything more and more. I wish I had more poignant things to say. I have friends who post relevant and elegant things all the time and I barely have time to do the laundry and cook dinner. Dinner has been soup and take out and left overs because we've been so busy. I don't like that because I love to cook. Plus cooking is healthier for the body and the budget. Also because of some friends and family I have joined both FaceBook and MySpace and they are o.k. I think I like FaceBook better. It doesn't clog up your screen or slowdown your computer. Plus FaceBook seems more rated G as far as their ads and stuff. I prefer rated G these days. That's about it for now. Sorry for my boring post but that gives everyone somewhat of an update.

Life Is Precious

Today I attended the Life Celebration of my neighbor Trish. We have lived here for about 10.5 years and she was the first one in to welcome us. Without people like Trish my home would just be a place where we live. Having neighbors like her makes it a home and a community. I truly regret not having spent more time with her. She was so full of energy and was kind and helpful to anyone. She was a beacon for the whole neighborhood. I will miss her so much. Is it just me or does it seem like some really truly good people go early in life, while others seem to have longevity. Her celebration was wonderful. They had a slide show pictures as well as plenty of hard copy albums and collages. Many joyful and funny stories were shared about her too. The time that I did get to spend with Trish was memorable. We had talks sitting on her front porch or in the back yard or many times when she was walking their dogs past our house. It is so weird to think that I won't see her anymore. It does make me want to try to be a better neighbor and friend to the people in my life. She set a great example and I know to do so would honor her memory.

Has It Really Been A Month?

I just realized a couple of days ago that is has been way too long since I posted anything. We have had some painful family growing pains during the last month. There aren't really any details to share, as sharing them would cause more pain and just be plain old gossip. So for those of you who pray just pray for us.

It hasn't been all bad but it only takes one big spill to upset the balance of things. It seems as though last night I finally got back on track. I cleaned like crazy and got so much stuff done and caught up. We had a great dinner (Taco's). We have plenty of tomatoes turning red in our garden, because we planted late in the season this year. So I was able to put fresh tomatoes into the sate pan with the onions, garlic, and spices; and then fresh diced tomatoes to go onto the taco's too. Then I cleaned and organized some more.

Also the whole week at work has been really productive. Then tonight we had taco's and more fresh diced tomatoes mm mm. Also since the tacos were basically already cooked I was able to make brownies and we had them warm with vanilla ice cream. Now here is some new information on us. I am allergic to cows milk, both the sugar (lactose) and the protein (casein). I am also very sensitive to wheat. My husband is even more sensitive to wheat than me. So when I say brownies and ice cream... it means two kinds of brownies and two kinds of ice cream. My sister and kids get the regular kind of both. My husband gets wheat free brownies and regular ice cream. Fortunately for me the wheat free brownies (Trader Joe's Brand "Gluten Free Brownie Mix") are also dairy free and my ice cream is actually made from vanilla soy milk. So it is a little bit of extra work but it is worth it. When we were first adjusting the to food changes it totally stunk, but with a little experimenting I found really close delicious substitutes. It is worth it, we have seen quick and real health benefits from our choices.

So things are settling back to normal again and life feels better. My sister and nephews started school last week and everyone seems to be doing pretty well. The brownies were a celebration that everyone has gotten at least one A so far.

I also realized that tomorrow is 9/11, not a good anniversary, but a reality of life today. I was working in a brokerage firm when it happened. As a result the whole stock market industry had lay-offs and I was one of them. However I did not lose my life or any loved ones. Tomorrow is a day of remembrance and sorrow. It is also a day to remember who we Americans really are and to know that everyday is a chance to uphold the principles that this country was founded on. Long live freedom and individual rights!!

A Summer to Fall Haiku for You!

Seasons change quickly
Butterflies and cooler nights
Autumns peaceful sleep

More About Me

Most opinions today will widely vary on what a Christian is. First for me it means that Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior, I have been buried in baptism for the remission of sins (full immersion). Yes I know big debate with many denominations. Second point I follow the Holy Bible believing that it is the Word of God “God Breathed” unchangeable, infallible, do not add to or take away from. You will not see me in a picket line against the political and social issues of today. You may see me engaged in conversation with family, friends, or strangers, doing my best to spread the Good News. You will not see me hating a group or person for their personal choices or trying in any way to force or enforce my beliefs on others or to ever pass judgment on others. I have loved ones from all walks of life and I pray for them and do my best to be a witness for God. However to me it is important to bear the fruits of the spirit and to absolutely allow each and every person on this planet to make their own free will choices for their life. I have seen hatefulness and judgment being passed off as Christian and it makes me sad and a little angry. The hatefulness and judgment out there is what gets portrayed the most in the media. That is not who I am or who the people that I go to church with are. It is most important that each individual learn about Jesus and then if they choose to live their life for Him that they take it one step at a time. Change is very hard and even though you gain your salvation and forgiveness when you accept Him and get baptized you do not change instantly on the inside. That happens over a lifetime of choosing to stay on His path by studying, praying, fellowship, and spreading the Good News to others. All of this is of course done with God’s help and guidance, it’s all in your Bible if you stick with it and ask for help when you need it.

I love being a wife and am very blessed to have Matt as my husband and best friend. We hope to have children someday soon but it has not happened yet. I love taking care of people, husband first, then family, then friends.

Keeping In Touch

Well I have done a poor job over the years of keeping in touch with a lot of my friends and relatives. Some local and some long distance. The end result, I have actually lost some of them. I have recently emerged from a long sleepwalk through life, some of it was depression and some physical illness. No matter what the reason there are casualties. I can't blame anyone for disappearing on me, because my lack of involvement over the years has yielded this result. I took the friendships for granted and thought they would always be there and now some are gone. So now I am doing my best to foster or rekindle existing relationships. Attention friends new and old I will do better from here on out. Life is going to keep going with or without me. So I am now actively participating. I am new to the world of blogging but I think that it will be a great start in helping me keep in touch.

My Best Friend

The house pictured here is ours. The flower beds were the first ones that "we" actually planted. Gardening is one of my hobbies that I use to escape from the world. In our front and back yard there have been beautiful flowers and blooming trees that were already there from before we moved in. We have been here 10 years. In 2005 we decided to do some D.I.Y. upgraded landscaping in the front yard. We went to a small local garden center and picked out around a 140 plants some individual and some in six packs. I was supposed be in charge of planting them but I got really sick with respiratory problems. It took all of my energy and the plants just stayed in their six packs and pots for weeks. So one day Matt took a lawn chair to the front yard, sat me in it and said tell me where you would like the flowers planted. He planted every last one for me. It ended up being very beautiful and a huge blessing because I stayed sick off and on throughout the summer. The flowers bloomed like crazy and attracted all sorts of butterflies, birds, bees, and very colorful moths too. I was able to sit on my front steps and enjoy the whole world right there in my flower garden. My husband Matt is definitely my best friend.

Good Afternoon, Good Evening, and Good Night

Do you have a person in your neighborhood who you love to visit with every time that you run into them. Many years ago I had an admin position at a brokerage firm. Before 9/11 and around the time of all of the bank and brokerage mergers. I was one of the first to get laid off, best thing that ever happened to me. Anyhow the point of my story is that one of my regular customers from the brokerage was a distinguished older gentleman. He is one of those people who just lights up a room. He lives about two blocks from my house and I frequently run into him. I could listen to him tell stories for hours. I live in a fairly populated area where it isn't really like Malta or any other small country town. People keep to themselves and keep extremely busy. Months or even years can go by and you can lose yourself not to mention your friends. But I always seem to run into this gentleman. I suppose it would be great to have him over for dinner once in awhile too. He lost his wife a few years back, so I believe that the next thing I will do during a reasonable hour is give him a call and invite him. Why would I have to move back to Malta to get that small town hospitality. That is where I grew up and what I used to know. It's time to start living like that right where I am.

Joy Peace and more Coffee!

Today my sister took all of us to the Virginia Zoo http://www.virginiazoo.org/ . Even though I have lived here almost 17 years that was one place that I had never been. It was pretty cool too. Family outings are great, it is so much better than just sitting at home.

Ranota is going to the Riverside Hospital Nursing School for the LPN program. For more than 10 years now she has worked at the nursing home in Malta and as a volunteer EMT for Phillips County. She has done a lot of amazing work with her patients. The work she does I would not be cut out for. Her plans are to go on to RN then MD and work in an Emergency Room. I have no doubt that she will accomplish her goals.

I continue to be amazed the last couple of weeks at how much more I am getting done since my family has been living with us. Ranota, Jerrit, and Brady, moved in with us on July 8th. Matt and I have not had kids yet. I have been alone a lot because for over half of our 14 years marriage my husband has worked either 2nd or 3rd shift. Being alone does some weird things to your head. So having a house full of people I love and want to help take care of has been really great. I know after many years of over analyzing myself that I was meant to take care of people. I love being a wife, look forward to being a mom, and love what I am doing now with my sister and nephews. When I have people to take care of I get more done, sleep better, think less, and have so much more joy and peace in my life. Hopefully within the next couple of years we will have babies or adopt some. For those of you who may not know or remember my parents Karl and Jan adopted me when I was 5 weeks old.

And of course with all of this going I you know I definitely need my coffee :)

Finally Blogging

Hello Everyone,

I will make this quick as I am at work. I didn't know what to choose for my blog name or URL so I chose coffee. Other that my spiritual life coffee gets me through everyday. And if you think about it who made the coffee bean...hmmm? With as much coffee as I consume, I really am full of coffee beans.

What gets you through everyday?

Ciao For Now
Onnie